Who Is Doctor Al?

With an IQ reaching nearly into triple digits, Dr. Al is a fully accredited member of AA, AAA, AARP and is working toward a GED.

Though his first school could not afford a signal to mark the beginning of classes, Dr. Al was always on time, for which he was awarded a trophy that he refers to today as the No-Bell Prize.

Later, Dr, Al became disillusioned with higher learning when, at the conclusion of a two-year fully-paid scholarship program conducting research at the Harvard University Chemistry Lab, he realized he had actually just been employed at the student cafeteria.

He accumulated an impressive set of degrees from several offshore universities, several of which were not island based, requiring Dr. Al to also become a Master of Dinghys.  His landmark paper about the best way to get to those universities, Row v. Wade, is still a bit moist after all these years.

His Doctorate thesis introduced the ground-breaking theory that while no two snowflakes are alike, a significant number of them could be mistaken for one another.

Dr. Al is the holder of over 20 academic certificates and Ivy League awards of merit. In his spare time, he likes to visit eBay and bid on academic certificates and Ivy League awards of merit.